#1: Decision:
You are just one decision away from breaking free or staying free from P-sex. You need a strong and firm decision so you can grow the will-power to do all it takes to stay away or break-free from P-sex.
Daniel 1:8 “But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself...” He decided (made up his mind) that he would not. Like every other likely addictives, sex requires you to make up your mind not to. That is the first thing you must do but for your decision to be effective, you need to first understand how you make decisions.
There are 3 kinds of people, those who take decisions instantly but later build upon it with concrete information; those who make them slowly and yet firm; and those who are indecisive, they seems never to be able to make up their mind. Breaking-free or staying-free is easy for those who make decisions instantly or slowly but for those who are indecisive, they’ve made themselves believe that it is an impossible venture to break-free from P-sex. That as you will soon discover is a lie. Start with a firm decision to break-free and stay-free until marriage. It is only upon this decision that all other principles will work and you will find help in times of need.
#2: Word Affirmation:
Self constant affirmation will help you live to the standard that will help you break-free and stay-free from P-sex. When you have decided against it, then you need to redefine sex and all it means to you. For most people, the concept of sex is the trouble. Ask yourself, ‘What does sex means to you?’
As a lady, ‘is it to please a man? You must remember there is only one man you can please with sex, that man is your husband. Is it to keep a man? If you must know, if sex can keep men, then, prostitutes should have like a thousand men each. Is it for money, to get along, quick pleasure etc OR as a guy, ‘do you see ladies as holes that must be penetrated? Do you think sex is a game? Whatever it is that is your concept now that is wrong, get a new concept that you can always affirm to yourself when you feel pressured by your old ideas of sex.
2 Corith 10:5 “casting down imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity...” Erotic thoughts and imaginations are the platforms of P-sex. If you can bring them to captivity them you will be able to control your surging libido. To put your thoughts in control, you need words. This is where, word affirmation comes in. Words when they consistent and firm help pause old thoughts and create new ones.
When you feel pressured by life or circumstances, you need good and positive words to speak to yourself. If you have nothing better, use the ones from the bible, i.e ‘my body is the temple of God’ or use ‘am a prince waiting for my princess’ and vice versa.’ etc
#3: Accountability:
If you can talk to yourself, then you can conquer yourself. And there is no better way to conquer self like being accountable to yourself and someone else you can trust. Colo 3:9 “lie not one to another; seeing that ye have put off the old man with his doings...” You must not lie to yourself in particular and then please get a mentor, someone who can talk to you sincerely.
We are human, control by lust and vain desires, we need a guide or we will stray wrongly. When people talk about discipline, they seem to forget that the word discipline is a military word and that you cannot be discipline without being accountable to self and another. Therefore, discipline and determination will not be effective without accountability. Please don’t deceive yourself, pre/extra-marital sex is seriously addictive and to get out of addiction, one can’t often do it alone, you will need help.
I want to suggest that you start your accountability journey with a mentor, someone older who is a trusted friend. It is even easier, you can do it with a phone call and you wouldn’t have to face the challenge of guilt and shame. Or you can try our mentorship and Sex-pure-centric support program, call 08077871959.
#4: Secure your environment:
Your environment in this context is your mind. When you can secure your mind then you can be accountable easily to self and effectively eliminate pressures. This is where the biblical ‘flee’ comes to play. 1 Corith 6:18 “flee fornication…” 2 Tim 2:22 “…flee youthful lust…” Run away from lust and fornication. I think, it means stay away from anything that will draw you into it. Secure your mind, which is, secure the gate to your mind, i.e. your eye-gate, your ear-gate and the places you go.
Prov.4:23 “Keep thy heart with all diligence; For out of it are the issues of life.” You must secure your environment by getting rid of every music or movies that create the desire for sex in you. Don’t undress yourself, and don’t be found in erotic environment. There is no strong person anywhere, human hormones have their own mind, so secure your mind. You still have the power to say NO but be sure you are not the one raping yourself.
#5: Secure your feet:
The only sure way to stay-free is to help mentor others. That is what is called the preparation of your feet. It is the only principle that works effectively well. To firmly secure your feet, you must help prepare and secure the feet of others. What you do for others, God will make happen for you. Securing your feet, is getting yourself ready to be an example.
Rom 10:15 “…beautiful are the feet of them that bring glad tidings of good things!” Your feet are beautiful before God when you help mentor others, which is bringing glad tidings of good things to others. Think about this, you are helping other five people to break-free or stay-free from P-sex, in your mind you know they will be looking up to you. So even if you feel pressured to step off the line, you wouldn’t let it happen because of them. Secure your feet baby, it is the security to all other tips.
Break-free, stay-free, it is possible, you can do it.
SHE Foundation: Watch out for practical exercise that will help you break-free from sex addiction.
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